Where are you?

Yes, I know that it has been a couple of weeks since I posted anything at Literotica. Some of you may be wondering where I have gone. Am I experiencing another writer’s block?

Nothing can be further from the truth. I have written over thirty-five thousand new words this month. Including not one but two four-thousand word days. In fact, one of those days, I wrote four-thousand-nine-hundred-and-forty-five words. Yes, just fifty-words shy of five thousand. My best day in at least four, maybe five years.

And I am gearing up for #NaNoWriMo2019 too. I have been cleaning, cooking, and prepping so that I can be ready come November 1st to get down to the serious business of kicking out some words.

Yes, but what words? What stories? And where are they? You ask.

I have written a crucial scene in Ægir’s though I have a couple of more before I am ready to post the climatic Chapter 10, then quickly after that Chapter 11, which is already complete and ready to go. Then, it will only be one more chapter to finish off that trilogy. I know ya’ll have been waiting impatiently for that one for a long time. Will I get to it during NaNo?

Who knows. The problem with me is…I am a writer. In particular, a pantser. I do not outline or sketch anything out. All I can do is sit down at my laptop and type whatever comes out. Hopefully, that scene will be one of those things…soon. But it is an incredibly hard scene to write compassionately. I am dealing, after all, with the issue of male impotence. Or erectile dysfunction as they politely call it today.

But the beautiful thing about my writing style as a pantser is…when I get stuck or bored with one thing, there is always something else to move on to. And with dozens of unfinished stories on Literotica, there is plenty to choose from.

So, what have I been working on?

A couple of my older stories on Lit have captured my attention lately. Ones that I thought were finished as short stories have burst to life as novels in my mind. In particular:

Tight Fittin’ Jeans from Loving Wives Yes, this story of ‘cheating’ has become a seasoned romance. (If you have not heard that term before, it means older heroes and heroines, usually forty plus, though I have quite a few in their late thirties.)

He was getting old. Fifty-four in a few days. Perhaps that was the root of this pensive mood? But he knew otherwise. It was her face. The photograph that was all over his newsfeed. He chuckled as the words of one of his favorite country songs flitted through his mind like the morning breeze through the pines whistling its tune.

“Stand by your man, and show the world you love him. Keep giving all the love you can. Stand by your man,” he hummed along with an old owl that was late getting to bed.

It was one of the things that had made it so damned impossible to get the woman out of his mind and heart. Loyalty and duty were things that Chad Harris knew well, the creed not just of the Corps that he loved so much, but of the grandparents, who had been the refuge from his parents’ strife-ridden marriage and bitter divorce.

He had known that night that it would be just the once. As she had said, it was her fantasy, her secret dream to be ‘just a good ole’ boy’s girl.’ But life had other plans for Cassandra McBride. Plans of which he could never be a part. He was alright with that. He took his one night. He held more woman than most men could ever dream. Then he, too, did the right thing and walked away. Never looking back.

Well, not often. But on mornings like this, when the years ahead stretched out further than the lonely prairie, it was hard not to wallow in old memories. Ponder the might-have-beens of life. But he had horses to tend. Chores to do. Perhaps he would even go into town for that haircut. But he was sure the upcoming trial would be all the old men in the barbershop were talking about. Perhaps it was best to put that one off for another time.

Then, there is No Strings Attached from Erotic Couplings. That one is over twenty-thousands words now and half-finished. With loads of strings in the end.

Jon Tyler stood outside the small diner. What was he doing here? It had been seven years. Seven hellish years. A nightmare that he would never awake from. The constant pain in his neck, shoulders, and upper back a continuous reminder of what had happened, what he had become. A monster. Worse than any Hollywood creation. This latest trip to the VA hospital was yet another memento.

So, why was he here? He was incredibly glad to see that the place still existed. With the economic downturn, too many small businesses were failing. He did not want to examine too carefully why it should matter so much to him that this one had not.

But he knew. He knew the truth. This was the last place that he had known even a modicum of happiness. That night had been burned into his charred brain. He had relived it tens of thousands of times over the past seven years.

Not that he thought he would catch a glimpse of her. Lauren. She would be long gone now. A shrink somewhere. Maybe even helping fucked up people like him, but he was beyond all help. Why he kept going was beyond him, but something inside him refused to die, as his friends had that night.

I have been working on the next chapter of One Night Stand too. Turns out this one ties into the storyline of Tight Fittin’ Jeans and happens in Sebida, Texas also…just like Shared Burdens. In fact, their baby is born in Esther’s house.

If that ain’t enough, I have a new one called The Goddess Chronicles…

My name is Rhea. I am the incarnation of the Goddess upon Earth. Or I have been for the past thirty years. This is the chronicle of my journey. The story of the true forces of light and darkness at work in the world. They are not what you think. Nothing is as it seems. But that is my tale too.

Why have you never heard of my Goddess? Why, instead, do male gods rule this world? Jesus, Muhammed, Buddha, Confucious, Zeus, Thor, and too many others to name? That, too, is part of Her fable.

Who is She? What does She stand for?

She had many names over time: Inanna, Ishtar, Isis, Gaia, Chirakan, Pachamama, Saraswati, Freya, Cerridwen, Spider Grandmother, and of course, Rhea. She is all of these and more. She is the hidden thread that is woven through those other tales as well. Search deep, beneath the religions, into the spiritual side of those others, and you will find Her there too. She has always been, and She always will be.

She is the Yin, but not dark as the world thinks of it. But, yes, She is mysterious and hidden. She is the earth, and She is woman. She is mother to all, protector, and She can be fierce when She must. But at Her core, She is love. She is the purest form of creation, life, and yes, sexuality.

Sex – that is Her greatest gift to Her creations. It is also the most feared and polluted by them, and especially those among you who seek to rule and control. Have you ever wondered why all those religions exalt celibacy, abstinence, virginity? Or why corporations use sexuality, especially the female body, to sell their things? Both know, recognize Her power, and seek to defile it.

She is everywhere. If you only look, seek Her. But like you, I did not know of Her. I was blissfully ignorant. Until…

I even have a kernel of another story floating around in my crowded head. Four best friends, women in their early/mid-forties, all at different places in life. They decide to find true love for one of their friends. Of course, it gets a little more complicated than that. But think about…if you had three exes, were crap at picking good men, would you let your best friends pick a man for you?

So, when am I going to publish these stories/chapters to Lit?

I’m not sure. I have even finished editing Shared Burdens, yet not posted it. Right now, I am not certain what is the best way to proceed. Lit seems to have changed since I last published there. I am not getting as many comments as I once did. And I am not sure how best to release my stories.

Do I wait until I have them all finished then release them chapter by chapter over the course of a couple of weeks? The way that I did with Rings of Fire and Nothing Done In Love. Or do I wait until I have finished them and release them as complete novels/novellas as I did with Labor’s End?

The problem is that my writing never fits neatly into categories/genres. There are loads of crossover in all of them. By publishing as a novel/novella, none of that matters. On the other hand, not everyone likes reading thirty to fifty thousand word books. Labor’s End certainly has not gotten the number of readers I think that it could have or should have.

So, I find myself in the same quandary that I have with indie-publishing. When you don’t write by trope, things are more challenging.

So, what do you think? Chapters in the closest category (mostly Romance) or wait until I finish for longer novellas/novels?

Of course, I have also been busy trying to lose weight, taking long walks and loads and photos, and quilting. Life is busy at our @HomeCrazzyHome. Oh, and a wedding to plan too.

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