Today a mercurial online friend texted me that he was happy. We have been friends for close to five years and like I told him I think that might be the first time he ever told me that.
When I asked why, he said he was afraid I would be disappointed. He told me that he had mentioned to his mother some books that he was looking for. Then today, when she came in from work she had bought them for him.
He said that sometimes it was the little things that made you happy. And it reminded me of this…
He agreed.
A few days ago, I was encouraging another online friend, who was depressed. I told him about some of those moments in my life. I have shared before that six years ago I had a miscarriage that so shook me that I went through a two-years long major depressive episode.
Yet, one moment stands out in that time. It was warm and sunny. PanKwake needed to get some of her energy out so we were in the small park that was just outside of the apartment. She was running and laughing (she loves being outside). And I remember thinking…In THIS moment, I am happy.
I had still lost a baby that I wanted very much (hell, I’ll always want them). I had lost three jobs in two years…through no fault of my own. My marriage was falling apart. And I could not go more than three blocks from the apartment without having an anxiety attack.
But in THAT moment, I was happy.
That is the thing…hold onto those moments. Those things. Books. A summer’s days in the park with your child. That bite of chocolate. That glass of wine. The laugh with your friend. A tender kiss. Stop and smell the roses…they are every where if you will take the time to look for them.
Tara Cox - Literary Erotica 