Thoughtful Thursday: To Thine Own Self

“To thine own self be true.” 

But we forget what comes next…

“And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”

Polonius, Hamlet Act 1, scene 3, 78–82 William Shakespeare

After a disastrous 2014 and another disappointment in the love department, I adopted the first part of that phrase as one of my mottoes for 2015. I even printed it out in my pretty purple, laminated it and stuck it on my goals quilt that hangs on the wall at the foot of my bed. It is the first thing I see in the morning and the last at night. I even bought myself a collar with those words upon it. Hell, it is still the logo on this site, my Facebook and my Twitter.

Then I fucking forgot it. Especially the part that comes next about not doing any man false. Oh, not in everything. I have remained true to myself in my relationships, with my family and friends. But professionally…I got pulled into ‘Big Business’ in a way that I do not personally believe in.

For two years, I had not released anything to Amazon, because I did not like the way they did business and treated their indy-authors. I made that decision after they changed their algorithms, making it harder for them to make the Top sellers list.

Then I joined a writers group and some of them were doing REALly well with KDP. So I traded my high and mighty standards for a bit of cash…not even that much. And I lost MY way…

To be clear…I am not bad mouthing Kindle or other writers. Amazon is a business, not a charity. Businesses are about making money. Sometimes/often that means at whatever price…in terms of morals. And other writers…well, I don’t know all their stories…or their moral compass.

But for ME…exclusivity is the wrong choice. It goes against my beliefs in terms of Big Business, fairness and getting my message out to as many readers as I can. A big thank you to a writer I admire, Kallypso Masters, for reminding me of that at just the right time.

I am ashamed to say…I acted like I had back in high school. One of the ‘in-crowd’ befriended me for some reason…and in an effort to win their approval, I betrayed my REAL friends. But just as I did back then, I have woken up and discovered that MY moral compass is more important than popularity or a few dollars.

So bottom line…I am taking my books off of KDP as they come up for renewal. The first is The Arrangement. Its term ends on the 20th. So I am pleased to announce that I am using up those five FREE days allowed under KDP…so until the 19th you can download 130K words of intrigue, GREAT sex, and funny characters facing REAL life problems like body image and sexual performance insecurities…a mid-life crisis…and being a step parent to a petulant teen. All for FREE.

But if you are not an Amazon reader, no worries it will soon be available at other distributors. Just updating a few things then it will be uploaded to AllRomance.com, Apple, Barnes & Noble, Nook and as many as I can find. And My Country Tis of Thee is next on Christmas Day…and it will be perma-FREE as the first in the Sergeant Mike’s Miracle Tour series.

As they say live and learn…and if this cost me a few dollars…so be it…being true to myself is more important than money. But that is just me…the all REAL Tara Neale.